No Excuses? Right here, Strive These

Pricey Jen,

Assist! It is July and there are not any good holidays arising, plus no birthdays in my household, and I WANT CAKE. Are you able to assist?

– Cakeless in Cincinnati


Pricey Cakeless,

My expensive wrecky minion, you’ve got come to the suitable place. Truth is, there are tons of excuses for cake, in case you solely be taught to rejoice the little issues in life.

A number of ideas:


Relying in your fiber consumption, I wager a few of you may rejoice this EVERY day.


My ’99 Nokia Nonetheless Works!

Leslie claims this was presupposed to say “Outdated mates are the very best.” However give it some thought: are you able to play Sweet Crush in your mates whilst you’re pooping? NO YOU CANNOT.

I relaxation my case.


It Was Only a Warmth Rash!

Time will inform.

(Really, Rebecca tells me this was presupposed to say “Child.” Is she telling the reality? Mmmm… PERHAPS.)


I am A Nice Eating Companion!

Particularly whereas consuming cake.


That Factor Is Over!

SUCH a aid, am I proper?


However possibly none of those apply to you, Cakeless. 
In that case, this is one for nearly everyone:

Not Lifeless But!

In truth, I feel we should always all congratulate one another for not being lifeless but.

So, congratulations, guys.

And sorry, ghosts-with-internet-access.


Due to Alyssa V., Rebecca W., Leslie M., Emilie F., Scott D., & Kat R. for the right excuse.


And now, our product placement of the day!

A Sloth’s Notebook Of Excuses